A LOVE THAT NEVER FADED
I watched as she quietly took care of him for the last nine years of his life. The love and gratitude in his eyes never faded, and though there were moments when sadness flickered in hers as his health declined, the constant presence of her love was undeniable. My mother amazed me with how she selflessly cared for my father without a complaint, other than when she would get tired on occasion, as was to be expected. There was never a purer example of what a marriage is in sickness and in health. Fifty-six years of steadfast dedication, deep love, and enduring commitment. An unforgettable example of selfless love and a wife who deeply loved her husband.
A LIFE OF SACRIFICE NOT SEEN BY MOST
Most people have no idea how much my mom gave of herself while caring for my dad. But she never saw it as a sacrifice. To her, it was simply what love and commitment looked like—being there for him, just as he had always been there for her. And yet, my mom wasn’t in perfect health herself. At just 39, she suffered a stroke that left her with lasting weakness on her left side and forced her to give up her career as a cosmetologist. I was only in seventh grade at the time, too young to fully grasp what was happening. She rarely spoke about her struggles, even though she needed far more support than she let on.
STRENGTH THROUGH ADVERSITY: MY MOTHER’S RESILIENCE
My mom is the embodiment of strength. After fighting her way back from her first stroke, she endured two more TIAs and another stroke—yet never once did she complain. She never asks, “Why me?” and never gives up. She refuses to accept the future the doctors predicted, one of diminished ability. Every day, as she recovered, she pushed herself through exercises to maintain her strength, and still manages the bouts of vertigo that sometimes leave her so nauseous, she has to lie flat in bed for days until it passes. No one sees that side of her—but I do. She keeps it hidden, not wanting anyone’s pity or concern.
DEVOTION BEYOND MEASURE
After my dad was diagnosed with prostate cancer, Parkinson’s, and eventually colon cancer, the future they had built together slowly began to slip away. The hopes and dreams they shared, and the love of a lifetime, seemed to be ending far too soon. And through it all, my mom, in her own weakened state, would take care of my dad tirelessly. From the moment he woke at 7:30 a.m. to the late hour of 11:00 p.m., when he took his final dose of medication, she was there—steadfast, patient, compassionate, and endlessly giving. Most people never saw how long and demanding her days as a caretaker truly were. But I did.
She gave up time with friends, the joy of tending her flowerbeds, watching her favorite TV shows, and the quiet comfort of quilting. Instead, her days were filled with caring for my dad. Each morning began with exercises she helped him with before he got out of bed. She carefully planned and prepared three meals a day to help meet the dietary needs that came with his colostomy. Twice a week, she helped him shower and change his colostomy. In his final years, when he relied on a wheelchair, she helped lift him in and out of bed, helped him dress and undress, and took him to countless doctor appointments—often ignoring her own health to prioritize his. And I watched. With a heart full of love and gratitude, because her selflessness gave us more time with my dad.
MASTERING CAREGIVING: A DAILY ACT OF LOVE
My mom made it her personal mission to ensure my dad’s final years were as comfortable and meaningful as possible. She rarely asked for help—only when something was truly beyond her physical ability. Her relentless determination to find the best ways to care for him made the demanding seem effortless. She had every part of his routine down to a science, handled with such grace and precision that, to anyone looking in from the outside, it simply looked like an ordinary day shared between a devoted husband and wife. But I knew the truth, and it left me in awe.
TEACHING ME THE TRUE MEANING OF LOVE
She has always been an inspiration, not just for the way she overcame multiple strokes with unwavering positivity, but for the quiet strength and grace she carries through every challenge. Her resilience has shaped me, but so has her love. She was always there with a listening ear, gentle guidance, and heartfelt advice—even when I wasn’t quite ready to hear it. Now, in my own adulthood, I find myself wanting more of her wisdom—her life lessons, her clever tips, her stories. She has taught me, by example, how to be the best mother I can be to my own daughter.
A HIDDEN HUMOR, A FIERCE SPIRIT
My mom has a fierce, sharp sense of humor—though most people have never seen it, hidden as it was behind the quiet shadow of my dad’s larger-than-life personality. Now, as she steps into a future she never asked for, she’s learning to navigate life and forge her own path. And in doing so, she continues to lead—not just for me, but for my brother and our children—showing us how to live with the same strength, heart, and dignity my dad would have wanted for us. No, this isn’t the future she envisioned. But she refuses to let it define her. She RISES. And in that, she gives me yet another reason to be endlessly grateful. She is strong, independent—and yes, I see it. I always have.
RISING ABOVE
So thank you, Mom—not just for all that you’ve done, but for the woman you are. Through your quiet strength, unwavering love, and boundless selflessness, you’ve shown me what it truly means to live with purpose and grace. You’ve taught me how to love deeply, give without expecting, and RISE—again and again—no matter what life brings. I carry those lessons with me every day, and I hope I pass them on just as beautifully.
I love you, Mom, more than words can ever fully say.
If you haven’t heard my dad’s legacy, read more on my blog, A Legacy of Strength: My Dad’s Inspiring Journey.
